We Go On
Then Comes Hope Book 1
by Regina Walker
Genre: Contemporary Christian Fiction
Warning: This book deals with loss by suicide and the grief a family endures.
Life has been comfortable for the Miller family. Liz and Josh have devoted their lives to raising their two sons. Their oldest son, Colby, reached adulthood and set out on his own. A few hard knocks sent him back to live with Mom and Dad, until life got to be too much, that is. As Liz and Josh grapple with the hole in their hearts left by Colby’s early departure from this world, they find themselves at odds with one another and with their faith.
Will they remember that Jesus is enough in the middle of this dark storm? Will they see through their own pain and help each other and their teenage son, Tyler, learn to live despite the grief?
She spent the first week numb to the world, to everything going on
around her. No tears, no rage. Just quiet disbelief and silence in her
thoughts made her feel crazy. The funeral broke open the floodgates and
the reality that her son was gone and after the funeral, the silence in
her thoughts turned to chaos, the tears wouldn’t stop flowing, and the
rage was consuming.
He wrapped his arms around her as she bunched up his shirt in her hands and clung to him, leaning heavily against him. “I just want Colby back,” she whispered. “Me too, love.” He kissed the top of her head. “You don’t have to eat, but come sit with me. Just ten minutes, please?” “Ten minutes, and then I’m going back to bed.”
“If you would have paid attention when Christy showed us, you would know.” He regretted his biting tone as soon as the words left his mouth. “It’s fine. I’ll just ask her when I get out there. Have a good day at work.” She retreated into the dim bedroom and closed the door. She leaned heavily against it and slumped down to the floor. For the first time in thirty years, she didn’t kiss him before he left for work. She wasn’t one to often believe in signs, but this felt like an awful one.
Liz swallowed down the acid taste in the back of her throat and glared at him out of the corner of her eyes. It was too much. She shoved her bowl of candy into his hands and walked up the steps. She disappeared through the front door and told herself to shut it gently but the anger bubbling within shot like lava down her veins and she slammed the door.
“Is he struggling? Because nobody can tell he is. He won’t talk about it. He won’t talk to me. I can’t take down the pictures or give away any of Colby’s things, or pack up his room, or even pick up his room.” Liz’s voice raised with each word. She stood up. “He just wants his bagel before work and off he skips like everything is normal!” She paced across the living room, turning and wagging a finger toward Stephanie.
As if a veil had been lifted from her eyes, Liz felt as though she was seeing the real man for the first time in years. She wanted to run to him and throw her arms around him and tell him they could find a way through it all. The familiar cloak of grief was like a weight that held her rooted to the ground. The steps back to Josh were hard and she didn’t run, but she did put one foot in front of the other. She sunk onto the bed beside him and wrapped her arms around him. He leaned into her and she stroked her hand gently over the side of his head.
He wrapped his arms around her as she bunched up his shirt in her hands and clung to him, leaning heavily against him. “I just want Colby back,” she whispered. “Me too, love.” He kissed the top of her head. “You don’t have to eat, but come sit with me. Just ten minutes, please?” “Ten minutes, and then I’m going back to bed.”
“If you would have paid attention when Christy showed us, you would know.” He regretted his biting tone as soon as the words left his mouth. “It’s fine. I’ll just ask her when I get out there. Have a good day at work.” She retreated into the dim bedroom and closed the door. She leaned heavily against it and slumped down to the floor. For the first time in thirty years, she didn’t kiss him before he left for work. She wasn’t one to often believe in signs, but this felt like an awful one.
Liz swallowed down the acid taste in the back of her throat and glared at him out of the corner of her eyes. It was too much. She shoved her bowl of candy into his hands and walked up the steps. She disappeared through the front door and told herself to shut it gently but the anger bubbling within shot like lava down her veins and she slammed the door.
“Is he struggling? Because nobody can tell he is. He won’t talk about it. He won’t talk to me. I can’t take down the pictures or give away any of Colby’s things, or pack up his room, or even pick up his room.” Liz’s voice raised with each word. She stood up. “He just wants his bagel before work and off he skips like everything is normal!” She paced across the living room, turning and wagging a finger toward Stephanie.
As if a veil had been lifted from her eyes, Liz felt as though she was seeing the real man for the first time in years. She wanted to run to him and throw her arms around him and tell him they could find a way through it all. The familiar cloak of grief was like a weight that held her rooted to the ground. The steps back to Josh were hard and she didn’t run, but she did put one foot in front of the other. She sunk onto the bed beside him and wrapped her arms around him. He leaned into her and she stroked her hand gently over the side of his head.
Regina Walker was born in the beautiful state of Colorado. She moved to Oklahoma in her late teen years, where she has resided ever since. She likes to curl up on the couch and binge-watch crime shows with her hard-working husband. When she's not wrestling with a writing project, she can be found wrangling their children, riding their horses, or tending the garden. Along with finding horses on their small farm, chickens, dogs, and cats can be found at nearly every turn.
Regina crafts compelling characters facing some of life's hardest challenges. Her heart's desire is to always point toward Jesus through the way her characters face challenges, relationships, and adversity.
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